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There are different kinds of relationships across the miles and they require different things. Wonderful at your friend's wedding in Wisconsin – and you live in Biloxi. Wonderful you've been dating for five months in Biloxi gets sent to Chicago for a six-month assignment.

Or, worse yet, his dream job moves there permanently and you don't want to choose between your own dream job (still in Biloxi) and your dreamy boyfriend. You and Wedding Wonderboy are getting to know one another across the miles, while the relocations take away a known quantity.

We discovered this when somehow we skipped two planned phone calls and I completely freaked out.

I felt millions of miles away from him (really, it was only 9,000), unloved, uncared for, forgotten...

On the other hand, be careful about relying on e-mail to resolve conflicts.

The problem here is that e-mail feels as casual as a phone call, but it's permanent. Tone, intentions and content can all be easily misconstrued.

Those of us who've tried can all attest: it's haaaaaard.

So rarely does one cliche so succinctly sum up something.

It can cause resentment if one of you foots the bill for everything.

For instance, unless you're looking for a casual, non-exclusive relationship, at some point, one of you is going to have to move.

That can add a whole lot of stress to your already strained couplehood. Are you evaluating whether one of you will move, and if so, does that mean marriage?

and I was sure he'd been hit by a bus and that's why he couldn't get to the phone. What had actually happened was that the nine-hour time difference got in the way. Remember this: missing a day (36 hours in my case) does not indicate relationshipial jeopardy.

He was in Israel and I was in the States and he somehow thought that calling at 3 a.m. If a phone call gets missed or an e-mail doesn't arrive, do not assume that your darling has run off with the cleaning lady or been hijacked. It's likely that one partner will need more communication more than the other. If you want more contact than your partner, try to be less demanding.

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