If that’s the case, maybe it’s time to re-evaluate whether or not you want to stay in the marriage. As to your desire to have sex with the other man, I can understand why you’d be enthusiastic. But keep in mind that part of what made the sex so good, is that there were no strings or issues attached to this man as there are with your husband.And consider too that while your first experience with this man was great, it might not be as fantastic on a regular basis — especially if you don’t really have much else in common besides an urgency to lock loins.The fantasy of having another man making love to your wife can take one of two forms, a selfless one where the woman’s pleasure is important to the husband and a more sinister form which is a rape fantasy, the husband imagines his wife being humiliated and degraded by the virtual rape of giving her to another man.When you enjoyed yourself, since he condoned the action, it was he who humiliated, embarrassed and cuckolded himself, which he now blames on you.
If he refuses to go to couples counselling (something I believe you really should do) and he doesn’t understand or care about what make you feel so great sexually with the other guy, he isn’t invested in your happiness or in the relationship.
If anything, the political outlook that I was raised with was fairly Cold War, but not too pronounced.
I was taught that the Soviets were the bad guys, and my family generally supported politicians from the Democratic Party.
The one thing he did want was to fulfill his fantasy of watching me have sex with another man.
I’ve tried everything to get him interested in making our sexual relationship more fulfilling for both of us, but he’s just not interested.